Little Pieces

It's amazing how many little pieces there are in a life, in the relationships that build a life. Me and Joe are missing four. Pieces. Our set of alphabet refrigerator magnets no longer has a C, an H, a Q, or a W/M. The C and the H, maybe even the W/M,  got lost when the fridge was saying MERRY CHRISTMAS and then got knocked into, and the letters fell off and, like, fell down a floor vent or got carried away by mice. Losing the C wasn't that big of a deal, 'cause we still have a K, and losing W/M wasn't that big of a deal, because we still have another W/M. It's inconvenient sometimes - like the other day when I was making a fridge collage of paperwork related to a tour of China I want to go on; I tried to hold the papers up with the letters for "CHINA" but it said "INA" instead - but really, there's no need to replace the set. Besides, it's been on every fridge we've rented ever since we got married.

I'm not very creative with the magnets, really. I don't mess with them much beyond "JOE ROX," arranged with "ROX" under the "JOE" so they can share the O, or "I LOVE U," stuff like that. Joe's arrangements are more interesting, because they try to use as many letters as possible rather than trying to make sense. Every once in a while, I'll be cooking or cleaning, and he'll just walk up and start moving letters around, and I'll smile at whatever I'm doing, and he'll come up with something like this:

"DUSTE LOGZ." It gets me every time I look at it. My favorite part is how the Y is up in the unused letters pile rather than in the place of the E. DUST-E LOGZ.

I know, it's not much. Just some magnets on my fridge, likely arranged in a state of restless boredom. Just a tiny piece of a normal life...but, still, a piece I never want to lose.

Instead of A Snickers

Yesterday, I was whining about how much I wanted to binge. "Today is my rest day," I said to Joe, "And I'm pretty sure Chalene [the instructor in the TurboFire workout videos] told me to buy a Snickers bar and eat all of it. I want candy. This is stupid. I want to be able to eat whatever I want. This is stupid. I'm hungry." We were walking home from the gym, where Joe had worked out and I had sat reading. As we walked, I was staring off into the distance, making him steer me around obstacles in our path and being as pathetic and obnoxious as possible. "I like brownies. I didn't eat my snack yet. This is stupid." I was truly a picture of misery. When Joe had had enough, he gently said, "You poor thing. Shh. I'll make you something nice when we get home, okay?" I said, "Yeeeahhh?" He said, "Yeah. Come on, we're almost home," even though we had only been walking for two minutes. "Okay," I said. "But we're not almost home. I'm cold. My legs are cold." 

I sat on the couch when we got home, and this is what Joe brought me from the kitchen. He'd concocted the recipe the first day we started with this balanced eating stuff, and we hadn't used the recipe again 'cause it contained too much fruit for it to fit in easily with the ration plan. But for special occasions, like pity parties, it's perfect.

Pyramid Smoothie

3/4 cup frozen mixed fruit

3/4 cup orange juice

1/2 cup yogurt

1/2 cup spinach

1 TBSP honey

Combine ingredients, blend 'til it's done.

No, you can't leave the spinach out. That's the whole point. "Pyramid"? Because the ingredients come from so many parts of the food pyramid? Plus, it really adds something special to the flavor. Actually, you can't taste it at all. I don't know. Either way, that sweet, fruity green stuff had me smiling in no time!

Me & Gym: Off Again

Six weeks ago, I started going to the gym again. Me and Gym have an on-again, off-again relationship; we'll see each other for a couple weeks, maybe three, then go our separate ways for a while, then eventually I'll feel guilty and go back to Gym. I'll lift some weights, spend some time on the treadmill. The first visit will go great: I'll push myself, perform really well, feel good about myself. The next visit, I accomplish what I did last time, but it's harder and not as fun. The third visit goes even worse. After that, the excuses start piling up, and the number of my visits to Gym dwindle fastly.

There are two reasons for this. Reason one is boredom. You can only run on a treadmill so many times before "stay home instead, and don't worry that you get winded walking up a flight of stairs" sounds good.

The second reason is poor nutrition. That was why my performance kept getting worse. I was wearing myself out, which was good, but I wasn't eating what I needed to build my body back up. We weren't having Burger King for dinner every night, nothing like that, but our diet was really unbalanced. We were probably getting like two servings of vegetables per person...per week.

One day about three weeks ago, Joe got motivated. For as long as I've known him, he's had an interest in physical fitness; he has a bedroomful of free weights and other heavy things waiting for him in the storage unit back home. He, too, has cycles of involvement with Gym. So for Christmas, I ordered him an intense 90-day exercise program on DVD called P90X. I didn't know he was going to take it so seriously so soon. The day those DVDs got here (when they weren't really a Christmas present anymore because it was January,) he started the program. He said he'd do it from start to finish, following the schedule and the nutrition plan.

If there's one reason I ever complain about my otherwise perfect husband, it's that he hates vegetables. But, according to the "diet," he's required to eat four one-cup servings of veggies per day. Joe, who wouldn't even eat lettuce, is so committed to this that he's been eating spinach salads for lunch every day, and brussels sprouts with dinner. The salad he ate on Day 1 of this endeavor was, he said, his first salad ever.

Of course, I couldn't let him do all that alone (and also he couldn't let me let him do all that alone.) I'd been going to the gym for about three weeks already, but my interest was flagging. Joe suggested I try TurboFire, a 90-day intense workout DVD program for women. I tried it, then buyed it.

TurboFire is a series of hour-long workouts with dancing and kicking and punching. Every day you get to do something different. The workouts are tough, but started at a level of fitness I could match with just enough effort. Every workout includes 10-40 minutes of stretching, which is very nice. While the exercises are going on, there's a second instructor off to the side showing you how to modify everything to make it lower impact, if that's what you need. The moves can be challenging, but that's okay because I just flail my arms and jump around when I don't know what's going on.

Me & Joe 2GETHA 4EVA

Today is Day 16 of a strenuous (to me, anyway) workout program which I haven't had to quit because I'm getting great nutrition. The P90X diet plan we're going by is basically a system of rations, a super-simplified way to get the right amount of calories. For example, my daily allowance is 5 servings of protein, 2 of dairy, 1 cup of fruit, 2 veggies (I usually cheat and get 3,) 1 fat, 2 carbs (which is about four pieces of bread,) 1 snack, and 1 2-TBSP-size serving of condiments. It requires a lot of planning. I always feel full and energized, though, and I'm always able to finish my workouts.

And there's literally no room for junk food. Not like, "If you're eating like this, you have no business eating junk food," but like, there's no ration category for junk food. Which isn't a problem, because since we got it all out of the house, I haven't wanted any. (Except for the other day when I saw someone eating a Kit Kat bar and had to restrain myself from grabbing it and cramming it down my throat.) When you're on a ration plan, every bit of food you're allowed to eat is a treat. I remember how excited I was when I arranged my rations to where I could have a piece of bread with lunch.

Joe's getting results, but I don't really know whether I am. I probably am. You can't work out like that and not get results. Mostly I'm just glad to not be bored with exercising anymore. And those Xes on my calendar keep me going. I can't skip workouts, 'cause I need my red X for the day. Yay!

So hang on now

I finally got around to opening my Bible. Like I said, I usually don't look forward to Bible time; it requires work and it's not always comfortable. 

For months, I've managed to keep myself procrastinated away from reading. Ignoring God can work for short periods of time like that - if I'm happy and life is going well, why would I go looking for work and potential discomfort? - but eventually, I start searching again. I have to. God is so merciful, he always brings me back.

So I read. I picked up where I left off back in November. Today's passage was Psalm 40. To make sure I'd stay awake and retain some sense of the message of the passage, I started taking notes in a way I'd never tried, writing personalized paraphrases of the parts that caught my eye.

And the passage was about me. It was to me. It was a message God's been trying to tell me for over a year. After digging my Bible out from under a bunch of stuff for the first time in months, I just happened to read that exact message in a random Psalm I'd never seen before. "If I wait patiently for the Lord, he will hear me and rescue me. I will be stable. I'll be joyful, and many will see and put their trust in the Lord. The Lord is kind to those who trust Him."

It was a "wow" moment, a gift from the God I've been avoiding. He'd led me to his Word to tell me something, and it wasn't "You're in trouble for always ignoring me." Instead, it was pure love. It was important. When it finally sticks, it will change my life.

I got up to fix dinner amazed that he'd spoken so directly to me. In the dark part of me, gray-black exhausting endless circles of despair were stilled by delicate, careful hope. Maybe this time...maybe, maybe, if I follow Him very carefully....maybe this time the message will stick.

I decided to check my Facebook before starting on the steaks, getting back into the swing of normal life after talking to God, when he gave me something else. Among the usual almost-spam, a friend who doesn't post often had typed the words "Cus God is God and He holds it together....so hang on now!"

It was so sudden, like being startled. I just stood there with my hand over my mouth and my eyes closed. The non-coincidences had lined up until I felt overwhelmed by God's work in my life, his reaching out to me when I was supposed to be the one seeking him.

I did a search of the lyric-like words and found the song they'd come from and listened to it. I was in awe, and broken by gratitude.

And to think I'd expected to fall asleep with my face in the Psalms.

Yeah we've all been lost and we've all been hurt
Where our hope is spent and our faith don't work
But nothing lasts forever
The only thing that matters
Is God is still God and He holds it together

So hang on now

Seollal, the Lunar New Year

In South Korea, the Lunar New Year is called Seollal. For most, it's a family-oriented holiday. There's a massive exodus with massive amounts of traffic in the days before Seollal as people head home to their families.

I was pretty excited to be here in Korea during this uniquely Asian celebration, and went out looking for festivities on the day before and the day of (the 23rd of January.) I didn't find much, but was rewarded in a few places.

The day before, a couple of friends and I went to the nearest large city, Daegu. We talked to a tourist helper lady who said there might be celebrations going on in some of the city's parks. So we went to a couple of parks. We saw traditional games being played and were even instructed on their rules.

A popular game involving four sticks that you throw and a gameboard with pieces you move around

 

A boy whips a dreidel/top thing to keep it spinning as long as possible

Gamepieces

This vase with sticks in it is another game. You get all the sticks out and go stand behind a line. Then you start throwing the sticks at the vase, hoping some of them get into the holes (which are worth different amounts of points.)

The throwing-blocks game and another dreidel thing being whipped

Hoop & stick

Also, we were encouraged to write a wish for the new year on a bright piece of paper to be hung with other people's wishes.

Writing wishes

My wish for the new year, with wishes written in Hangul and Japanese hanging all around it

Koreans are generous people who give gifts for many, many occasions - our landlord often gives us fresh fruit and bottled beverages, maybe because we're in a business relationship with him - and shops carry gift boxes full of bottled drinks year-round. They stocked up on extras for Seollal.

Red and green gift boxes of drinks

Other places had gift boxes of oranges, apples, and Asian pears. 

Gifty fruits

More gifty fruits

The lady in the red coat saw me taking pictures of her gifty fruits and kindly invited me inside to take a picture of her and her friend

One thing that struck me in my travels was how many people were carrying gift bags. 

At the train station the night before Seollal

Busy streetcorner on Seollal

Another gift on Seollal. And a Lotteria, which is a lot like McDonalds.

One Seollal tradition, mostly involving children, I think, is the wearing of Hanbok. I really wanted to see people wearing this traditional clothing, but almost no one was out in public dressed that way.

Hanbok and a hoodie

On the 23rd, I went out exploring on a route that took me half a mile from our apartment to the gate of Camp Carroll, then back in the opposite direction maybe two miles to an area where I thought I might find a park and where I'd heard there was a Buddhist temple, then into Downtown Waegwan. 

Closed for the holiday

I managed to find the temple, and that's where the most exciting part of my Seollal happened.

There actually wasn't much to see at this temple.

The temple

Light inside

A fountain and a shrine

Ice in the bowls (it was cold outside) and someone left a 1000 won bill under a bottle

When the exciting thing happened, I had been taking pictures for a little while. There weren't many people at the temple. I was done taking pictures and didn't really want to leave yet without something more interesting happening. 

There was a building that looked like it might be where the monks lived. So I stood at the top of a stairway near the building, looking around, just standing there waiting for one of the temple people to do something, even though they were all inside. I actually didn't have to wait very long. A Korean lady, probably in her 40's or 50's, approached and motioned as if she was eating, and asked me, "You eat?" or something like that. I felt pretty awkward now that my plan had actually worked, and said, "Okay, thank you," and she led me inside the building that looked like it might be where the monks lived, into an empty room with Korean-style tables. I sat at a table on a cushion on the floor, and she brought me a plate of kimchi, bean sprouts, and something I couldn't identify. 

And then, she brought me the soup. I started saying, "Oh! Thank you!" because I was SUPER EXCITED because I recognized it as Tteok guk, a soup traditionally served on Seollal. She told me what it was, and I thanked her profusely, then she left me alone to eat.

Tteok guk (the soup in the stainless steel bowl with seaweed on top of it.) And the bright red stuff is kimchi.

The white things in the soup are thinly sliced cakes ("Tteok") made from rice flour dough. The dough is shaped into long cylinders, almost like short, very fat noodles, and sliced into pieces, then boiled in broth to make this lucky Seollal dish. It tasted very much like chicken and dumplings, without the chicken. I ate maybe half of my soup (but no seaweed) and everything on the plate (except the kimchi.) I took pictures of the room.

Some floor-cushions on a shelf, and the doorway to a kitchen

After my initial excitement, I spent most of my eating time wondering whether I should leave money. I decided not to. You don't even leave tips here in Korea; paying for a meal offered out of kindness seemed ridiculous.

A man I'd seen on the grounds entered the room around the time I was done eating, so I stood up with my plate and bowl to show I was done and was trying to help clean up, then bowed and thanked him and left. I was so happy.

For the Seollal finale, I bought a package of dried things which I had seen in a video about Seollal and which I thought were traditional holiday food. I don't know for sure if they're traditional holiday food or not, but I do know that they're pretty gross. They were dried persimmons, called "gotgam" in Korean.

Yeah, I took this picture.

They were mushy and sweet and would have been like candy 100 years ago but are now kinda ew because we have real candy. That white stuff on some of them, I thought it was mold, but Joe said it was fruit sugar that had risen to the surface of the persimmon as it dried. Turns out he was right.

I was a little disappointed that I didn't get to see any celebrations or many Hanbok, but that soup made all the exploring time totally worth it. (Of course, exploring is an experience in itself...but...I got to eat some tradition!)