I Finished Insanity Two Hours Ago.

Although, if I were grading myself, I'd probably get a C+. With the + being from pity.

I think it would've been different if I'd been paying any attention whatsoever to nutrition during the second month. I wanted to quit Insanity during the first week of month 2 because the workouts had gotten longer and more difficult. If I'd been eating vegetables and stuff, the right number of meals and calories - instead of skipping meals, letting vegetables rot in the fridge, and my amazing birthday cake,

and too much fast food - I know I would have done better. Last time I did something like this, I learned that nutrition really does affect how great I am.

And so I wasn't great. It's a little disappointing. But not really, because the important thing was to just get through it.

Okay, here's a list of everything I did wrong that wasn't food:

• INJURY DAYS: 5 - Actually, these were legitimate. Jumping wrong = back pain for four days. The other day was a knee day.
• EXTRA REST DAYS: 6 - Maybe I can just call them mental health days? I can't even tell you how luxurious it felt to be like, "I'M NOT DOING IT AND YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!"
• CANCELLATIONS: 1 - It was Shaun T's birthday gift to me.
• CANCELLATIONS, FOR REAL: Okay, there were 2. One of the workouts is crossed off, and I didn't actually do it, and I wasn't going to tell anyone.
• CANCELLATIONS THAT HARDLY COUNT: 4 - See those "Core Cardio and Balance" in the middle that I didn't do? I decided to skip to Month 2 instead of completing the recovery week, because I wanted to make sure I had enough time to "complete" Insanity before we leave for Japan tomorrow, and also Core Cardio and Balance is EZ MODE so I thought it would be okay.
• HALF-DOING IT: 1 - One day, I just played the first 20 minutes of a workout and mostly read a book but sometimes did some of the exercises they were doing on the screen. I think I did about 1/3rd of 20 minutes of that 60 minute workout.
• SUBSTITUTE EXERCISES: 5 - During the second month, on four days, I chose to do an outdoor activity instead of an Insanity. Those were actually still challenging and good (but still technically cheating.) Also, one day during the first month, I chose to do an easier workout than what was scheduled, which was not actually challenging or good.
• SPLIT DAYS: 2 - Some days, the schedule said to do the 8-exercise, 25-minute "Fit Test" to track my progress AND THEN!!!!@!!! do a 60-minute workout on the same day. I didn't do them on the same day.

NUMBER OF DAYS ON INSANITY SCHEDULE: 56

NUMBER OF DAYS I REQUIRED: 72 (EMBARRASSING)

TOTAL NUMBER OF NOT-INJURED 

FAILURE DAYS:

21

OR 37% OF SCHEDULE DURATION

I would say "Oh well, maybe I'll do better next time!" but I don't think there will be a next time. INSANITY IS REALLY BORING.

Really boring, but effective. Obviously. (I'd imagine that ANY workout would be effective when done approximately 6 days a week.) I lost fat and gained more upper-body strength than I've ever had before in my whole entire life, and I made progress on the "Fit Test."

I can now do in rapid succession a lot of made-up moves even better than I could in January! HOORAY!

The View From the Top

I've mentioned that I'm doing the Beachbody workout program Insanity, that it's boring and repetitive and I hate it, and that I'm going to finish it. To keep myself from burning out on it even more than I already have, sometimes I'll replace an Insanity workout with something that's equally challenging but less stupid. So yesterday, when I saw "MAX INTERVAL CIRCUIT" on the schedule, I thought of my I-don't-have-to-work-out-today-because excuses for like five minutes (as I do almost every day) and just went running, instead. Up a mountain.

Well, not exactly a mountain. There doesn't seem to be an official size definition of what makes a mountain, but it used to be 1,000 feet, or 304.8 meters. The land mass half a mile from our apartment building, "Hill 303," is 303 meters. So...almost.

So I jogged over there, set my timer, and started going as fast as I could. I saw one American couple, and quite a few older Koreans. The Koreans were mostly dressed in long pants and winter coats and, along with the normal encouraging thumbs-ups and words that I had no idea what they meant, I was asked a few times if I was cold in my shorts and tank top. It was about 60 degrees out there, and I was being super active, so I wasn't. But the only time I don't get asked that is when it's like 100 degrees.

It took me 19 minutes and 50 seconds to get to the war memorial at the top of 303. I felt like I was asphyxiating. I hung out up there until I could breathe again, took a couple phone pics, and started back down.

20 minutes plus the short, easy jog from our apartment to the hill-mountain wasn't much of a workout compared to the 55 minutes of stupidity I would otherwise have had to endure, so I decided to run up to the helipad, too. Then do pushups (even though there were people up there so it was awkward.) I did three sets of 20. I was really impressed with myself; four months ago, I ended a two-minute pushup challenge with a score of 14 pushups.

See? You can see the H on the helipad from space.

THE END!