Finally, the Return of the Brain Sunshines!

I woke up this afternoon (at 1:30, because I have the most amazing job in the world and because I went back to sleep after Joe's and my 6:30 AM - 10:30 AM time together) with a peace and optimism I haven't had in, like, two weeks. I was like, *streeeeetch* "Hello world! It's so sunny outside! I wonder what time it is. Man, I'm comfy. Who would've known blankets on the floor would make such a great avoid-dragging-mattresses-up-three-flights-of-apartment-stairs bed? I think I'll lay here and read for a little bit then get up and do some things. Because you know what? I can totally get all my work done before I go to Korea in 36 days, or 21 business days, and I can do as much or as little today as I want and everything will still be fine."

It was nice. I haven't had the "I'll definitely get everything done before Korea" feeling in over two weeks. I've actually been extremely distracted and not very happy and and I haven't done any work. Yes, mom and Joe, my next sentence was going to include the words "blame" and "hormones," thank you. But! Apparently, I've snapped out of it. (For the next two weeks, anyway.)

Last week, I made two Korea Kountdown Kalendars and taped them to the walls in front of each of my computer areas. One of the kalendars is in front of my workstation to remind me to stop wasting time and start doing work. The other is in front of my play-station so I can look at it and be happy at how many days are X'ed off.

So! 36 more days to cram 3 months' worth of work into, with international moving preparations sprinkled on top.

36 more days til I get to leave limbo and make a real home again.

36 more days til I get to remember exactly what about our life together - about him - I erased so I'd be safe.

Of course, I'll be way happier when we're down to, like, 15, but 36 is good enough for today.